Monday, 16 December 2013
Mid-December Blues 2013
I really need to stay away from people at the moment. Christmas is coming and I’m getting increasingly intolerant of the fake good cheer that accompanies this time of year.
I’m also getting a little disheartened at seeing people who have achieved something in their lives as all it does is make me feel worse at having achieved nothing significant in my own. This isn’t an attack on those who succeed in life in a way I have been unable to, simply a statement of fact as to how their success and achievements makes me feel.
I am, as my little profile headline says on this very blog, nothing to anyone and while I have to accept that to be the case, it doesn’t exactly make me feel very good about myself.
I have said this on a number of occasions but this blog hardly sets the world alight even when I say something with a bit of merit and, as a result, makes me feel that it isn’t worth writing at times. I’m not expecting people to bow down before me and revere me as some kind of prophet or guru but I would like to think that what I write makes some kind of difference to the way people think.
I post personal experiences of my mental health condition so that people can see what it is like to suffer from a mental health issue which in my case is depression. I view my posts as a kind of mental health awareness piece of work and I hope that my posts do illuminate what it’s like to suffer from depression but they are more likely ignored.
I try to use my blog to comment on the state of the UK’s political system and the horrendous quality of the people who supposedly represent the general public in Parliament. I have no idea whether I succeed or not but I have a sneaking suspicion that it is the latter.
I also use this blog to air the truth about some of our elected officials by making sure that every letter I write to an MP or other official is posted here as well as any replies I receive so that the public can see our elected officials in their true colours. All that seems to have done is bring down upon my head the laughable wrath of a disgruntled MP.
I really should just stick to observing the antics of the rest of the human race and, for my own enjoyment, comment on the fall of the human species as greed, self-interest, money, hate and the battle for dwindling resources tears our civilisation apart and rapidly turns the Earth into a living cesspool.
I should revel in watching the ultimate destruction of the human species by its own hands and laugh as I try to choke back the tears knowing that, if I had been able to make this blog more of a success, I may have had a hand in slowing the inevitable decline of a race whose technological prowess far outstrips its wisdom to the detriment of the planet and the entities that dwell on it.
Perhaps I’m just having a bad day today or perhaps I’m just facing the reality of my existence but I really think that I should just stay away from people, not bother about trying to make a difference and just sit at home waiting to die in the inevitable fireball created by mankind’s hatred of everything.